Relations, Marriages and Casteism


As it’s the season of love the best thing to be talked about is obviously Love.  There are many forms of love, love between a mother-father and their kids, the love between two siblings, the love between a husband wife, the love of a son for her mother the love of a daughter for her father etc. Love has various forms like respect, fear etc, so it’s very wrong to associate love with just couples, we can even go out and celebrate Valentine’s Day with our family.

When the discussion starts with love the first place where we get to know about love is family, and when it comes to family it means relations. I don’t know why we don’t treat all relations the way we want our relations to be treated, like some wife’s don’t want her husband and his brothers to be together,  on the other hand she wants her sons to be together always and to support each other.  It’s simple you get what you give, so what your children will see, they will also do the same, and what if someday her sons are fighting and when she says something to them, and they back answer her that their uncle and dad also used to fight then why she wants them not to fight when she used to enjoy those fights. This is just one example, there are hundred more, so keep a close watch on what your actions are preaching, because life has no replays no retakes.

The second thing associated with love is marriage. Marriage is the biggest controversy of today’s generation. For half of the people it’s just a deal, because they always want to judge marriages with respect of Dowry, parents want their sons to get married to a girl from where they get a good amount of dowry, and the girl’s parents either doesn’t tell her about the dowry, or say it’s for you and your betterment. How can money replace love? When relatives come for a marriage, they just have a habit of finding the faults of the couples; guy’s side family finds the fault of the girl and vice verse. Once it’s done then the discussion goes on dowry and then if it’s huge, they start praising the girl, the same girl whom they where criticizing earlier. In all of this drama where was love, how many people actually see the values that the girl/boy has after the looks, and even if it’s not a good looking partner but is rich they get married. Do they even get a chance to know whether they are the soul mates of each other or not, in such cases where a relationship is a deal, how will it stand for lifetime, because deals are successful only if they are for limited period of time, lifetime deals are never successful.

Sometimes I wonder do parents want their kids to do arrange marriages only because of the dowry factor, because I heard many people saying, the daughter of so and so married that guy of other caste only because her parents didn’t had money to give dowry in case if the girl had to do arrange marriage so that’s why her parents compromised and let their girl marry a guy of other caste, etc… hats off to people’s thinking.  When you can’t say something good why are you spoiling your tongue by saying something bad?

Couples do love marriages because they love each other and this is the thing that should be given importance instead of money, status etc. Love marriage is not a bad option, most of love marriages are fatal because of the poison injected by others, and then people blame love marriages are bad choice. No relation can be successful unless and until you have a wish to make it successful, and I think arrange marriages are successful only because of the relatives pressure and fear. Only because two people want to get a divorce and live their life their way, we think the people who get divorced are bad. When you all made their marriage a deal instead of a divine feeling, what else they can do, and this mistake of parents, spoil the next generation thinking and many lifes.

When it’s a topic of love marriage, castism plays a very important role, as most of the love marriages these days are inter caste based. I know it’s very difficult for two persons coming from a different background to match up each other, but this is the case with arrange marriage also, only because if a person belongs to the same caste as you do, doesn’t mean he/she has the same set of values you have. Even if we go on considering one caste, they have so many sub castes etc. now this means in future people will get their daughter married to their son/cousin because we are so busy these days creating divisions based on what not, so this will be the only option that will be left. Each day a new sub caste / section comes into existence.  People are so narrow minded that even after dividing India into states, then cities then district then talukas then areas they now want to sub divide India more by making two cites from one etc, have we ever heard of merger?. Shame… It’s a simple thing that we have to understand, “The path that leads to happiness is so narrow that you can’t walk on it unless you become one.

I just wanted to ask one thing with everyone who is so deep in this castism stuff and even divide God on that bases, if we have different God for every caste etc, then how can we say which God created which animal or bird or mountain or sea or  wind or oxygen, common man I should know the answer because if some day I come to know that water was made by a God who doesn’t belongs to my caste God I will have to stop drinking water, because many people do these kind of things, they don’t drink / eat from people belonging to other caste etc.  When you can’t say which God made the birds, water, animals, etc how you can say that God is different, because he made everyone the same there are no sub castes and categories in cases of things like air and water etc, it’s we humans who have created different Gods etc. God is just one, who has different forms, and each heart that beats is a form of God, so respect it, and when you will start respecting everyone, you will realize how beautiful this world is.

Remember the beautiful lines of the song, “Panchhi nadiya pawan ke jhonke, koi sarhad na inhe roke… Sarhad insano ke liye hain, socho tumne aur maine kya paya insan hoke…” so true, just think how many beautiful things we are missing only because the walls between us, I agree walls protect you from danger, but only because it protect us, this doesn’t mean we will create walls around us and sit inside it, because after a period of time it will be nothing great than suffocation, so have doors and windows inside the walls from where you can go out enjoy the world and bring the different beautiful things of world to your home and also show the world how beautiful you are. Remember before showing to the world which caste etc you belong, don’t forget to show people that we all belong to one creature of God that is a Human, never let that humanity be buried inside castism.

I hope after reading this article at least some one will give importance to love instead of all stupid things going out in the world. A love filled Valentine month to everyone, and please don’t forget love after the valentine month ends…

Let love be in air always… Let LOVE win and ego loose…


3 thoughts on “Relations, Marriages and Casteism

Add yours

  1. dado sutho likhiyo athav….nice-ly explained….it is not necessary to celebrate valentine day…instead respect …love…you valentine with pure hearts…that is true homage to valentine..the saint of love


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